Why

The annoying question, "Why?" has been a source of much growth and discipline lately. I figure God has to deal with me as you would a preschooler so He has been asking me this question incessantly the past few weeks.
So how this pertains to my inner dealings with the Lord is this: I struggle with desiring something I don't perceive as having and God asks me, "Why?" to help me uncover the junk I am choosing to be a slave to in contrast to basking in the freedom of His truth.
 For example:
Katie: I wish I had beautiful long, thick hair.
God: Why?
Katie: Because I want to be beautiful.
God: Why?
Katie: (begrudgingly) Because I want people to look at me.
God: Why?
Katie: (feeling really lame) Because I want people to make much of me.
God: Why?
Katie: (do I have to answer?!) Because I am afraid people won't like me if I'm not sort of a big deal.
God: Why?
Katie: (now I'm feeling pretty stupid) Because I think this world will make me happy.

As silly as this may seem, this has really been a useful tool in digging down deep in my little heart and recognizing that old nasty sin I cling to instead of God's truth. As embarrassing as it is to admit, my vanity has been weighing me down tremendously lately. Am I pathetic or what? It is ridiculous. It is selfish and stupid. I should be much more mature and not care at all what I look like and focus my energy on truly important things; things like molding my children's hearts, serving my husband well,  being an agent of change in the areas of homelessness and extreme poverty to name a few. And yet here I have been making myself sick focusing on my self image over and over again, spending a little too much time in front of the mirror trying to create some persona of togetherness and beauty.
But God has been faithful. He will not let me settle for a quick fix or even a continuation down this slippery slope. So He asks me why I think this way and leads me down a path of humility and confession. Why is it important that I feel pretty? Why do I value outer beauty so much? Do I really buy the lie that we are worthy because of how we look or what we do? I have but I choose to fight this lie. You may not think this is a battle you are engaged in, but I guarantee this need for a sense of worth permeates our human psyche. Depending on what demographic you find yourself a part of, worthiness is defined in so many different ways.
Thank goodness I have a hope to cling to beyond what this world offers! Thank goodness my worthiness comes from the One who made all things. I am more than the sum of my actions, thoughts, weight, reflection in the mirror. I am Christ's bride and a daughter of eternal royalty. I'd be in big trouble if I had to weigh my worthiness based on the world's scale! I've got nothin! Oh but I am more than a conqueror in Jesus and He loves me more than I can fathom. And He loves all of his babies. We are all so very loved and I pray we would stop walking around like a bunch of unloved orphans.